#30Trust Day 8: My Heart’s Desire

Last night, I joined a 30 day project that encourages you to cultivate self-trust by responding to prompts offered by thought leaders. The prompts are inspired by the writing of Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Today’s prompt from Mary Jaksch asks…What are you too scared to write about? 

Dang it!  Today is day one for me.  And here she is pulling this punch.  But what else should I expect.  I asked to look inward and be changed and here it is.

I feel stuck with this blog.  And it may be way less complicated than I am making it out to be, but it may not be.  For a good part of my life, I have wanted to help others find their voice and their self-confidence by using the arts and creativity.  The pull there happens as a result of finding my own voice in much the same way.  I understand what a life change can happen when someone engages in a creative act and discovers that what they had to say or express is valuable.

In some ways, I have been doing this work for over 20 years.  I taught drama, art, dance, and music classes.  I lead workshops in which we looked at death through the lens of art and gave performances based on self-reflection.

But there came a time when my dream got bigger than what I was doing.  I imagined myself touching more people than those I was effecting in my community.  I dreamed of traveling the United States and even outside to share my message with those who might need it.  I wanted to be a cheerleader to those who had lost their creative spark.

And I felt like getting more schooling would be a great benefit.  So I stepped out to do just that.  And here I am with the degree.  Now, I am learning how to make my dream fit within the guidelines of my profession.  And darn it, if I don’t feel like I am starting over.  And yes, beginner’s mind can be very valuable, but the fact is, in many ways, I am not a beginner.  I have already been doing much of what I want to do.  And yet, I feel boxed in.

The ironic thing is that I think I may be doing exactly what I want to help others break out of.  Is it a matter of self-confidence?  Yes…but more than that too.  I am not sure I have all the information I need.  In the mean time, I will keep doing what I am doing and allow the rest to simmer below until I have all the ingredients I need.

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About Rachél

Hi, I am Rachél.... the quirky, big-hearted soul behind Creativity Tribe, a sanctuary for your creative spirit. As a life coach and artist, I know the importance of community, celebration, and transformation. Creativity Tribe is abuzz with connections to other creative bloggers and offers tips and stories to inspire your creative lifestyle! http://www.creativitytribe.com/
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4 Responses to #30Trust Day 8: My Heart’s Desire

  1. Jackie Paulson Author says:

    I enjoy your #Trust 30 Prompt story. I think we all want to feel like we are helping other and contributing. I also think that those of us, like me, who cannot pin it down are on the way to discovering our own voice, and creativity and that does take time. I believe the universe will tell us when we are ready, the teacher will appear!

    • Rae says:

      Jackie, thanks for your insight and support. That is why I love social initiatives like #30Trust. It is a great way to meet people you might never have touch your life otherwise!

  2. Grammy E says:

    I have been pondering and wringing about unfulfilled expectations., But I have not written a post on it as yet. Maybe it will be a book. But all the issues we have can fall into this category. When our wish or desire is not what we wish the it brings us down. Simply by removing expectations or judgments we remove pain. And allow things to flow. I myself feel as though with the changes I made I am no linger connecting with any one. I feel alone. But this is myself withdrawing and changing. And I have no one reading my blog forever changing so I see no sense in continuing. I also started doing more creative writing or art on The empty Nester and lost my base of readers. I try to not allow this to cause me to judge my intent. It could just be people are not blogging or reading as much. But. I know like you I have something to share with the world. But maybe the world is not listing. Every one is lost in the media of tv news. Or thoughts of survival. Etc. Sorry to ramble on. But Just know you are awesome. And I am reading.

  3. rosemary says:

    Your Inquisitivness has found yet another voice for you. Congratulations and Trust in onesself is a wonderful trait. Go for it and you will find the mystery link/s that you are so desiring.

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